The kindness of strangers

On a warm sunny day in June 2023, Jane Spence, 68, and Julie Whittaker, 91, sat on a wooden bench in the garden of Broomgrove Care Home, surrounded by azaleas, berries, pyracantha and a trickling water fountain. It was their first time meeting, and they realised they had all sorts of things in common. They both loved fell walking, gardening, the Peak District, home cooked meals, watching sport and sharing stories about their grandchildren. “There was an instant rapport,” Jane says.

The pair have met every week for two and a half years now. Jane is among 287 volunteers who spend time with an isolated older person in Sheffield as part of a volunteer scheme pioneered by SCCCC — or “S and four Cs”, as it's more commonly known — a charity that supports older people, their carers and their families. Every Tuesday, Jane takes the long walk from her home in Ringinglow to Broomgrove Road in Broomhall to visit Julie. “We always have a lovely time,” says Jane. “I feel that she does benefit, because she brightens up instantly.”

Julie, a mother of three, is lucky enough to have one of her daughters live close by, but by 2022, after living in a care home for six years, she was craving more contact with the outside world. Her family reached out to SCCCC, who added her to their long list (currently around 500 strong) of older people waiting for support from volunteers.

Jane, a retired primary school teacher, tells me she was initially sceptical when SCCCC suggested she visit Broomgrove to meet Julie. She had long been uneasy with the concept of care homes and how we segregate society by age, something she thinks makes intergenerational community building more difficult. However, after a positive first meeting, and noticing how attentive and caring all the staff were, she decided she wanted to go ahead.

Jane usually brings a few photos taken at her weekly fell running club or from family gatherings. She tells me Julie can always recognise where in the Peak District the photos have been taken from the curve of a hill or the shade of the rocks, and that she delights in hearing Jane’s stories about chaotic playdates with her grandchildren. Sometimes they watch live sport on the telly, like tennis at Wimbledon or Liverpool FC, Julie’s favourite club. But more often than not, they just end up talking.

“I feel very strongly that in the future we need to look at old age very differently,” Jane says, emphasising the importance of older people having independence and purpose in later life. She tells me Julie surprised a lot of people with how quickly she rallied from a hospital visit for encephalitis, which left her with cognitive and communication difficulties. “She astounded people with how well she came back from it,” says Jane. “She’s very capable.” While on rainy days they both prefer to stay inside, drinking cups of tea and eating chocolate marzipan biscuits, on dry days, Jane encourages Julie to join her for a walk around the garden.

According to a 2021 report from Generations United, older adults who have intergenerational friendships may experience fewer falls and less frailty and an increase in strength and balance. Equally importantly, the report cited data that showed that older people who participated in intergenerational programmes reported “less social isolation, more social support, sense of connectedness and community”.

Ericka Hill, the charity’s fundraiser and marketing officer, says the scheme has provided solace for its volunteers, too. “We have a lot of international students who say it helps them with their English,” she says, adding they’re often missing the relationship they have with their grandparents back home. “And they learn so much from each other, it’s wonderful. One guy wanted to go on the internet, and his volunteer showed him how to do internet shopping. And the volunteer wanted to ask about the war, and he told her all kinds of stories about the war.”

It’s clear that Jane and Julie have become very close. When Julie’s son visited from California, he made a point of meeting Jane so he could thank her for the time she’d spent with his mum. But it wasn’t until SCCCC published a blog post on their website highlighting Jane and Julie’s friendship as a success story that Jane realised just how much the visits meant to Julie. The blog post contains a quote from Julie’s family, which read: “Getting to know Jane has made an amazing difference to Mum's morale. It became obvious last year that Mum was often lonely and longed for more contact. The family supports as best we can but most family members live some distance away and there is a limit to how often we can all visit. Mum looks forward to Jane’s visits each week, which has lifted her mood; she is so much happier. As a family, we can’t thank Jane enough for her generosity.”

How did Jane react? “It's lovely to feel appreciated,” she says, sounding choked up. “I felt really quite surprised how much they felt for me.”

A few weeks ago, we asked our readers to suggest a charity for The Tribune to support this Christmas. One of you mentioned SCCCC, saying the entire team is so warm and friendly and that they all work so hard to support people over 65 experiencing loneliness. If you want to support a charity this Christmas, please consider SCCCC. You can donate by clicking this link.

• £10 pays for an emergency food hamper for an older person.
• £50 pays for a DBS check for a volunteer, to allow them to carry out their work safely.
• £300 pays for training programmes for volunteers, including sessions on dealing with bereavement and how to support someone living with dementia.

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